Reply To: Wedding Gift Question
Yea, it would be a total guess to know what your “plate” costs. I think people say that because they know a dinner at a nice restaurant usually costs about $50-$100 a person, so that’s what they give.
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@LBH that’s true. I more meant, when I’m giving a gift, I would like to make sure it’s something the couple wants. And that’s why there are gift registries, to make sure people get what they want/need...
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I think the “cover your plate” rule is silly. It’s up to the bride and groom how much money they can and will spend on a wedding. If a couple has really expensive tastes and wants to throw a lavish...
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But you have no idea when you go to a wedding what it costs. We’re having an outdoor wedding on a farm. Sounds less expensive right? Well the tent and bathroom rental is pushing $10,000 between the...
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I think a gift is a gift. If its something you don’t like, that sucks for you. You shouldn’t have to make sure someone wants what you are gifting to them.
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I agree that the OP needs to check if this canvas was on their registry, or if this was just a “Ohhh you know what’s a good gift idea!?”. If I were receiving a $300 gift I would probably want it to be...
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Yeah, I hate whoever started the “cover your plate” rule. Really? YOU decided to spend $X for my dinner, so now I have to pay that much to attend? Bullshit. OP, I would go in on the gift with your...
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I was thinking the same thing TheAttack! They’ll probably love it but it isn’t in their taste, that’s a big ol’ present that’s going in the attic.
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@katie, lol, based on the boyfriend’s and my abject poverty due to being grad students, I’m pretty sure that we’re leading the way in that fight! Yeah, per cost per plate, either you get us to...
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And yeah, the cost per plate is ridiculous. How do you have a clue what the couple spent on you? I can guarantee you that only a handful of my guests could even get a ballpark guess.
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Yeah, if their parents are paying, that makes sense. We got so many discounts when we got married because we took over a date for a cancelled wedding six months out, and we still didn’t even come...
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I really don’t like the idea of buying the couple a huge piece of décor unless you know for a fact that they want it. They’ll feel obligated to display it, and the wrong piece of décor (when it’s...
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Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that people should find out the specific cost per plate and make sure that they give at least that much. Especially if they’re traveling from far away. If it were my...
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yea, “cost per plate = gift amount” is bullshit. someday it will die… hopefully someday soon…
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I know 3 people in the past 2 years who have profited off their wedding and assumed they would. Again, I’m 100% sure that’s not the majority by any means, but it does happen. Especially when the...
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I agree with GG. I don’t think any guest should have to give a gift. We also price it out depending on how much the wedding costs us overall. So if its a destination wedding and we have to rent a...
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I bet you that in the last 20 years, no one has ever gone to a wedding without a gift. Its basically required. You, GG, and most good people, would never have a big wedding just to make a profit....
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LBH- I’d like to meet people who actually MADE money on their wedding, if they were paying for it anyway. Our guests were extremely generous, and we made less than half back. S Also, OP if your in the...
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But you don’t host a wedding to get gifts to “cover your cost”…also it’s not required to give a gift to attend a wedding. It’s a really nice gesture and commonly happens, but it is in no way required....
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Regardless of cost of plate, I always give at least $100 per person coming with me. I understand that varies in different areas though.
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I know plenty of people who had big weddings just to make money, sadly. In fact, I overheard a conversation specifically about inviting certain people because you know they give a lot of $.
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I don’t gift at the cost per plate. At that rate, my boyfriend and I would spend like $150-200 on wedding gifts alone. This is too much on top of travel and hotel costs. I don’t think that qualifies...
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I disagree on the per plate $$ being bullshit. I think it’s tacky when people show up to a wedding that they can’t afford to attend without even attempting to cover the cost of their plate. I’d be...
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Is the $80 to $100 what you and him would gift together? If so, then you’re good. If you would typicaly spend say $125 to $150 as a couple then I would give a second gift of the balance. The gift per...
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I agree with Tech. You definitely want to give something to cover your boyfriend’s plate cost. My rule of thumb is about $80-$100 per RSVP (my $ might be a little off for some parts of the country –...
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I would buy into the gift as a “gift from the bridesmaids/best friends” and then yes, do a modest gift like @TECH suggested for the wedding or bridal shower. Is the canvas on their registry though?...
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my gifting life rule is your friend/family, your gift. so, in this situation, as you, i would buy into the canvas as your gift from both you and your boyfriend, and then get a card and have him sign...
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Do the other bridesmaids have significant others? What are they doing? I would say your boyfriend should not contribute towards the canvas with the other bridesmaids because that would be awkward. You...
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I was very close with three other girls in college, and one of them is getting married this summer. We are all bridesmaids and one of my friends asked if I wanted to contribute for a group gift, of a...
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